Fighting the silent epidemic: loneliness

For many people coming out of the festive break and into the New Year can be a challenging time of the year. And it’s for a reason that few talk about, but is a growing problem: loneliness.

According to automotive charity Ben, more than 9 million of us feel lonely all or most of the time, with loneliness now becoming known as a silent epidemic.

Pinpointing the reasons why someone may be struggling can be difficult. As Ben says: “Loneliness can often be the result of struggling to connect with people and developing relationships, which could be due to lack of confidence or self-esteem. An episode of loneliness can also be triggered by a significant life event such as a bereavement, a relationship breakdown, a move to a new area or because of physical or mental health challenges. There isn’t a simple way to identify loneliness and it’s a very personal thing, so there’s no ‘one-size-fits-all’ way to tackle it.”

But there are ways to tackle loneliness, so if you’re struggling or you think you know someone who is, perhaps the below tips could help…

1 What does loneliness mean to you? 

Firstly, have a think about your current situation and why you feel that way. What does loneliness mean to you? How does it make you feel? What do you feel you’re missing in life? What would you like to change?

2 Reconnect with yourself first

Now it’s time to reconnect with yourself. Hopefully you’ve worked out what you feel you’re missing, so now spend some time thinking about what you want to achieve. What do you need from life? What interests you? What motivates you? What kind of people do you want in your life? By discovering what you want, it will help you take the right steps to get there. 

3 Focus on quality not quantity

It’s important to identify that connectedness is about the quality of relationships, not the quantity. So, make sure the relationships you have in your life make you feel good about yourself; spend time with kind-hearted, genuine people. Time is precious, so make sure you spend it with the right people. 

4 Social media – done the right way

Social media has often been linked to causing loneliness because people only portray what they want people to see and ‘friends’ aren’t actually real friends. This said, the online world does offer an easy way to connect to new people, friends and family, as long as it’s used in the right way. The key is to use social media as a starting point to meet people and keep in touch, with the end goal of meeting up face to face, so you don’t miss out on real human contact. 

5 Let technology be your friend

Facetime, Skype, WhatsApp and a host of other messaging platforms offer ways to stay connected to those close to our hearts, even if you live far away from each other. Video chats and instant messaging allow us to keep in touch with anyone, so use it to maintain and nurture connections. 

6 Fancy a meet up?

Try visiting sites like www.meetup.com which feature get-togethers with people in your local area. There are a wide range of events featured by people just like you, who want to find like-minded others to do activities with. There’s something for everyone, with categories ranging from sports to learning and food and drink to music. If there isn’t anything in your area yet, why not try setting something up yourself? Think about what interests you and go from there. 

7 Get your geek on…

Ever fancied learning about photography? Or learning a new language? Why not use your time to learn something new and look into a course in your area – or go online. The online course industry is booming – there are loads of reasonably priced courses on www.udemy.com among many others. And joining a course means we can meet people with at least one interest in common, which can be used as a foundation for a new friendship.

8 Pursue hobbies and interests

Pursuing hobbies and interests is one of the best ways to develop relationships and get out of the trap that is loneliness. Think about what you enjoy doing or what you would like to try. For example, you could volunteer, get involved in your local community, try an exercise class, join the gym or take up cookery. If you’re struggling for inspiration, why not think about what you used to enjoy as a child?

Joining a sports team can give us a hobby, creates an immediate group of people we regularly see, and grows a sense of belonging. There are thousands of teams in hundreds of sports to join, so find one that works for you.

If you’re suffering from loneliness, you don’t have to suffer in silence, Ben is here for you.